Acting as a spirit has given me some rather unsettling dreams and irrational fears of certain scenarios. Especially when I saw that the next episode of Find the Wasabi is about my mission in the haunted hospital. It just reminded me of this dimly lit HDB corridor where I was filming at, the eerie green lights of the Exit sign, the flashing of lightning and grey skies just contributed to the feel of the set. And coincidentally then, I was instantly reminded of my hellish visit in the haunted hospital in Japan when I stared down the dingy halls of the corridor. The zombie-looking ghouls that went after me with their bloodcurdling moans which sounded exactly like those of The Walking Dead walkers. Yet this time I am the one who is supposed to scare. But I am almost embarrassed to even look at passersby in the eyes, afraid to frighten the living lights out of them. Guess I would fail miserably as a “ghost” in an amusement park haunted house.
Usually I am even too afraid to watch a horror film even with friends. I couldn’t and still can’t understand why some people enjoy watching horror shows. They just give me lingering nightmares and make me highly strung and paranoid about things around me. I would be unable to filter out the images from my mind for days and the moment I close my eyes, these images are the first thing that pops into being. If I watch the shows in the dark theatre, the effects would be quadrupled; the scenarios would replay in my head for weeks like a recorder player that refuses to switch itself off, and I would be unable to sleep without lights on. Even as I take a mundane shower or wash my face, I would be inclined to turn my head swiftly to check for anything suspicious behind me, even to the point of getting stinging facial soap suds in my eyes. Yet this time I had to go through the trauma of watch horror films and trying to convince myself that I was just looking out for the technicalities of being ghostly, and that it was just the suspenseful music that was tricking my mind, and the distorted faces were all just due to fantastic makeup.
At the same time, I felt liberating to act as the thing that scares a person, rather than a person who was being scared to death (literally in certain shows). The fun things a non-human could do, the power of being an astral being, I experienced them all on set. Of course, coupled with a great fun-loving crew team, the possibilities were limitless.